Feeding The Beast
“To devote or contribute an undue amount of resources, time, or energy to a self-perpetuating pursuit, situation, behaviour, or desire.”
In Oliver, we were feeding the beast. This was the best wifi we had connected to since Williams Lake. We binged on Ozark and cheered on the athletes competing on The Ultimate Beastmaster thanks to Netflix. There was little else to do. It was rainy, there weren’t trails to hike, and I was exhausted by the unfamiliar smells and the bird cannons going off all the time. We got under each other’s skins quickly. Netflix was easy to focus on.
I felt myself needing a retail shopping experience. I was grateful I’d been forced to downsize the stuff I carried with us from house to house for all of the wrong reasons. I don’t know that I had processed what that downsizing meant. Not then. I didn’t fully understand what was gone. So the need to shop may have been a side effect of having the world close in on me. We went to Canadian Tire in Oliver, the only box store there, and bought a small ceramic heater for the bathroom. It’s so quiet, and a necessity for the mornings. It was a perfect distraction from the screen time we were abusing.
We started using up food in the pantry because we were crossing the border in a few weeks. I baked muffins. Sadly, that was the last time I baked muffins. I didn’t carry any good intentions over the border for baked goods, which is a shame because I love baking. Good intentions don’t have any room in our small kitchen.
After our streaming binge, we explored the Vaseaux Lake boardwalk and found a cool wooden two-storey tower for watching birds. We spotted an osprey about a kilometre away. Jamie caught him using his zoom lens. A storm approached so we weren’t there long. We wanted to love the town and surrounding areas, but instead we stayed attached to old habits.
There was an empty spot in the overflow area beside us, so we started parking the truck there to have more room outside our trailer. We were crammed in and couldn’t even open our awning. The truck provided a wall of privacy from neighbours we found too chatty. The sun even came out, and we got on our other screens to read.
We happily packed up and prepared ourselves for Osoyoos. That change was exactly what was needed to slay the beast.
We all think about eating better and exercising more, and we blame the bad habits for not having enough time when it’s simply about our bad habits.
Without a work uniform, I was dressing for comfort. I saw myself taking less care with how I dressed. Jamie’s style evolved for comfort too. He wore shorts. All the time. My goal is to not only dress for comfort but to take care with how I put myself out into the world. Travel can lead us to cope with the discomforts of change by eating more, or by taking less interest in what we wear.